Broken Bonds
by CharlottexTobias
Summary: "Are you leaving?" He turns away, avoiding eye contact. His hands softly slip away from mine. "Please, just.." He looks at me, his eyes not as deep blue as I know them. They're like the ocean, still deep blue, but hurt. "You now.. I can't stay.. It's just.." I nod, fighting back the tears. I have to be strong for him. "Com here." I say, hugging him tightly. "I love you."
1. Chapter 1

I stare at the ceiling, supposedly grey, that is now covered in darkness. It always succeeds to keep me awake, especially on nights like these. These nights, the nights before something important happens.. On these nights the darkness of my room is comforting, soothing. Darkness is complicated, yet simple. I can think about its secrets, but it's not so complicated as the darkness of a person, a person's darkness is not clear and easy to unravel. This one is. It's pure darkness itself. I roll over to my side, now staring at the wall. I can see the lines and cracks in the grey stone vaguely, but the sight disappears when clouds cover the only light at night. My eyes slowly close and before I can do anything about it I drift off in a sleep. I'm used to my dreams now, in some way, it keeps me close to the people I love.

"Big day today." I nod, forcing the outer corners of my mouth to turn upwards.

"Well, I know you'll make the right choice." I nod again, I will, it just depends on what she thinks is the right choice. My mother isn't a bad mother, but she's not what an Abnegation mother is supposed toa ct like. She's expecting too much of me, she's expecting me to do things I can't handle, make choices that aren't mine. And if I don't, she'll start crying, blaming me for all I've done wrong. I'm used to it already though, I guess she's just mentally instable, that's what dad always says. We have to be careful with what we do. She's perfectly capable of being abnegation, but we have to help her through it. My dad's quite the opposite of my mother. He's always thinking of others, not putting pressure on anyone. He's what you can call Marcus' right hand. Marcus is the abnegation leader and I'm patiently waiting for my father to take over his job. Yes, it may seem cruel, but I'm waiting for him to die. Not so that my father can have more power, but for personal reasons. That put aside, my father would be a much better leader. He wouldn't put pressure on people, but he would get the job done, he has his ways you know. Just by being kind and helping people out he's able to make people do what they have to do. Because of my father's personality, I'm afraid I look more like my mother. She's way less abnegation than dad. And even though I can be a hell of an abnegation member, I know I can never be as abnegation as needed.

"Let's go dear." I look up from my bowl of oatmeal and push it aside. I normally love oatmeal, but right now I can't eat it. It's not like I'm nervous or nauseous, I just can't eat right now.

"I'm coming!" I pull on my grey sneakers and follow my dad to his car. I normally take the bus, dad thinks it's way to spoiled to take the car on normal days. But this isn't a normal day. I relieve a small sigh and lean back in my car seat. This isn't a normal day at all.


	2. Chapter 2

**So, because chapter one was so short and I felt like it, here is chapter 2! It's not super long or whatsoever, but it give syou something more to read. **

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The hub is crowded. Everybody is trying to get a seat in the front row so that they don't miss a thing. Well, most people are. Us abnegation wait in patience to get the seats that are left over, and if every seat is taken, we'll just stand. The erudite are trying o get the best seat though. That way, they can see everything that happens, take pictures of every scandal for their newspaper. Then you have the candor, they usually sit on the third row and past that. Some of them come early and get a seat in the front row, but most of them just take it easy. They like sitting in front, but it doesn't mean the world to them. The amity sit behind that ore in front of the erudite on the floor. They're not competing over a good spot, simply because it mostly means fighting.

And then you have the dauntless, it's a little unpredictable. Some of them form a group and are always together, others make an erudite give up his place.

I'm standing in the line of sixteen year olds, waiting to make their choices. I glare at the crowd, searching for a male figure with, supposedly, black clothing and dark hair. I can't find him though. Since 3 years ago I tried to find his face over and over again. He's just never there. I sigh and bring my attention back to Jack Kang, who has just finished his speech and is about to call the first name.

A dauntless boy, or should I call him 'man', steps to the front, takes the knife without hesitation and spills his blood over the sizzling coals. He grins, forms a fist with his hand and throws it in the air, making the Dauntless members scream to welcome him. He's followed by another Dauntless who seems to be his twin brother, also welcomed by screams and I can't wait to experience that feeling.

"Abbigail Ackinson." I look up as my name is called, my hands playing with the hem of my shirt, making me look nervous. Maybe I am nervous. I wouldn't know what for though, my choice is clear and even though my mother wouldn't like it, I'll just do it. So why should I be nervous.

I answer Jack's smile with a small nod and take the knife. Putting it against the palm of my hand, I step forward to be able to reach the bowls. I make a cut in my hand and stretch out my arm. Without hesitation I open my hand, letting a couple drops of blood fall on the hot coals.

I search for my parents faces and see them standing at the back, my mother shocked and my father putting an arm around her shoulder to comfort her. His face doesn't seem shocked though. This was to be expected if you really knew me, my mother never really knew me.

My hands are leaning on my knees, recovering from the run we just had. I'm not used to running, especially not to running upstairs, but I guess I just have to get used to it then. If I want to make it trough initiation, I'll have to be able to do a lot more than running.

"There's a train!" I look up when hearing the male voice.

"Come on Abbi!" I smile and nod at Eric, running towards him and the group of initiates to catch up. We have a total of thirteen initiates, but from what I've heard that number will be slimmed down. I just hope I'm not part of the ones that end up factionless.

A dauntless member that is supposed to lead us to the dauntless compound catches my attention. He starts jogging, speeds up to a run and waits till the train wagon is next to him. I hold my breath as he jumps in, but he does it like he's been training on it for all his life. Everybody follows him, jumping into wagons and so do I. My heartbeat fastens as I get closer to the edge of the roof, adrenaline. It pushes my fear aside and causes me to run faster, come closer, jump higher. I clamp my hand around the handle and pull myself further in the wagon.

"Kickass." I look forward for a couple of seconds. Stunned, as if the comment wouldn't fit this situation. And then I laugh, I burst out in a loud laugh, the kind that would make people glare at you in abnegation. But I'm no abnegation anymore, I may not be a full Dauntless member, but feeling like it is enough at the time being.

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**Hope you guys like it. Oh, and Eric is not the Eric created by Veronica Roth, it's my own original character. Review please, tips are always welcome dears**. **Greetings~**

The hub is crowded. Everybody is trying to get a seat in the front row so that they don't miss a thing. Well, most people are. Us abnegation wait in patience to get the seats that are left over, and if every seat is taken, we'll just stand. The erudite are trying o get the best seat though. That way, they can see everything that happens, take pictures of every scandal for their newspaper. Then you have the candor, they usually sit on the third row and past that. Some of them come early and get a seat in the front row, but most of them just take it easy. They like sitting in front, but it doesn't mean the world to them. The amity sit behind that ore in front of the erudite on the floor. They're not competing over a good spot, simply because it mostly means fighting.

And then you have the dauntless, it's a little unpredictable. Some of them form a group and are always together, others make an erudite give up his place.

I'm standing in the line of sixteen year olds, waiting to make their choices. I glare at the crowd, searching for a male figure with, supposedly, black clothing and dark hair. I can't find him though. Since 3 years ago I tried to find his face over and over again. He's just never there. I sigh and bring my attention back to Jack Kang, who has just finished his speech and is about to call the first name.

A dauntless boy, or should I call him 'man', steps to the front, takes the knife without hesitation and spills his blood over the sizzling coals. He grins, forms a fist with his hand and throws it in the air, making the Dauntless members scream to welcome him. He's followed by another Dauntless who seems to be his twin brother, also welcomed by screams and I can't wait to experience that feeling.

"Abbigail Ackinson." I look up as my name is called, my hands playing with the hem of my shirt, making me look nervous. Maybe I am nervous. I wouldn't know what for though, my choice is clear and even though my mother wouldn't like it, I'll just do it. So why should I be nervous.

I answer Jack's smile with a small nod and take the knife. Putting it against the palm of my hand, I step forward to be able to reach the bowls. I make a cut in my hand and stretch out my arm. Without hesitation I open my hand, letting a couple drops of blood fall on the hot coals.

I search for my parents faces and see them standing at the back, my mother shocked and my father putting an arm around her shoulder to comfort her. His face doesn't seem shocked though. This was to be expected if you really knew me, my mother never really knew me.

My hands are leaning on my knees, recovering from the run we just had. I'm not used to running, especially not to running upstairs, but I guess I just have to get used to it then. If I want to make it trough initiation, I'll have to be able to do a lot more than running.

"There's a train!" I look up when hearing the male voice.

"Come on Abbi!" I smile and nod at Eric, running towards him and the group of initiates to catch up. We have a total of thirteen initiates, but from what I've heard that number will be slimmed down. I just hope I'm not part of the ones that end up factionless.

A dauntless member that is supposed to lead us to the dauntless compound catches my attention. He starts jogging, speeds up to a run and waits till the train wagon is next to him. I hold my breath as he jumps in, but he does it like he's been training on it for all his life. Everybody follows him, jumping into wagons and so do I. My heartbeat fastens as I get closer to the edge of the roof, adrenaline. It pushes my fear aside and causes me to run faster, come closer, jump higher. I clamp my hand around the handle and pull myself further in the wagon.

"Kickass." I look forward for a couple of seconds. Stunned, as if the comment wouldn't fit this situation. And then I laugh, I burst out in a loud laugh, the kind that would make people glare at you in abnegation. But I'm no abnegation anymore, I may not be a full Dauntless member, but feeling like it is enough at the time being.


End file.
